Sexuality weaves its way through our lives and our views and behaviors change as our life paths and experiences do. Thus sexuality education is essential to equip individuals to make informed choices about sexual initiation, behaviors, and relationships. Opportunities to address sexual issues arise throughout childhood and adolescence. Adults should utilize these opportunities to facilitate discussion about sex. However, adolescence and early adulthood are often times of curiosity and experimentation, mixed with peer pressure and the desires to belong and to be loved. As we enter adulthood, with greater experience and understanding, we develop a potentially mature sexuality. We establish our sexual orientation, integrate love and sexuality, forge intimate connections and make commitments, make decisions regarding our fertility, and develop coherent sexual philosophies.
From birth, we are rich in sexual and erotic potential, which begins to take shape in our sexual curiosity and experimentations in childhood. As children, we are only partly formed, but the world around us helps shape our sexuality. We will examine both physical development and psychosexual development. Psychosexual development involves the psychological aspects of sexuality.
Our understanding of infant sexuality is based on observation and inference. It is obvious that babies derive sensual pleasure from stroking, cuddling, bathing, and other tactile stimulation.
The young child's healthy psychosexual development lays the foundation for further stages of growth. Psychosexual maturity, including the ability to love, begins to develop in infancy, when babies are lovingly touched all over their bodies.
The body actually begins its first sexual response in utero. Sonograms have shown that boys have erections. This begins a pattern of erections that will occur throughout their lives. Signs of sexual arousal in girls, though less easily detected, begin soon after birth and include vaginal lubrication and genital swelling.
In some cases, both male and female infants have been observed experiencing what appears to be an orgasm. Obviously, an infant is unable to differentiate sexual pleasure from other types of enjoyment, so viewing these as sexual responses are adult interpretations of these normal reflexes and do not necessarily signify the infant's desire or interest. What it does reveal is that the capacity for sexual response is present soon after conception.
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Children become aware of sex and sexuality much earlier than many people realize. They generally learn to disguise their interest rather than risk the disapproval of their elders. Starting as early as age 3, children begin to explore their bodies together. They may masturbate or play "mommy and daddy" and hug and kiss and lie on top of each other. Same-sex activity is more common during the childhood years when the separation of the sexes is particularly strong. Most go on to develop heterosexual orientations; some do not. But whatever a person's sexual orientation, childhood sex play clearly does not create the orientation. The message "If it feels good, it's bad" is often internalized at an early age, leading to psychological and sexual difficulties in later life. Virtually all psychologists, physicians, child development specialists, and other professionals agree that masturbation is healthy. Negative responses from adults only magnify the guilt and anxiety that a child is taught to associate with this behavior. Image from McGraw Hill Image Library
Families also vary in the amount and type of physical contact in which they engage. Concerning children's needs for physical contact, we can make the following generalizations: All children (and adults) need freely given physical affection from those they love. The quantity and quality of physical affection influence both children's emotional well-being and the emotional and sexual health of the adults they will become. Children should be told, in a nonthreatening way, what kind of touching by adults is "acceptable" and what is "not acceptable." Children need to feel that they are in charge of their own bodies and that no one has the right to touch them with sexual intent. It is not necessary to frighten a child by going into great detail about the kinds of bad things that others might do to them sexually. A better strategy is to instill a sense of self-worth and confidence in children so that they are aware of appropriate and inappropriate behavior. We should listen to children and trust them. Children need to know that if they are sexually abused it is not their fault. They need to feel that they can talk to an adult and be heard.
Puberty legally begins at age 12 for girls and 14 for boys. It is the stage of human development when the body is capable of reproduction. Adolescence is defined as the social and psychological state occurring between puberty and into full adulthood. Adolescents are constantly learning about their gender and social roles, sexual scripts, meanings of sexual feeling for others, and sexual orientation.
During adolescence sexual development is influenced by several groups. In terms of their parents, the children's learning involves connection, or lack thereof, that they have with their parents. In addition, family characteristics and dynamics influence teen attitudes and behaviors when it comes to sexual development. Although there are other factors that influence sexual development, parents play an integral role and need to initial discussions regarding sexual desires, behaviors, and personal responsibility.
Peers also influence sexual development. Adolescents receive more information about sex from their peers, especially their same-sex peers. There is pressure provided to carry out traditional gender roles. For example, boys encourage other boys to be sexually active, even if they are unprepared or uninterested. Young people must be able to communicate their sexual beliefs and desires. Parents, teachers, and others need to communicate to the youth about their desires, needs, and boundaries, while providing tools and support.
The media is another source of sexual development for children. Children and adolescents absorb and respond to mass representations in various ways. Media can influence their attitudes and behaviors when it comes to teenagers. There needs to be a balance between the sexual hype in the media with information about real life. Sexuality occurs in the context involving several psychological and physical components and a great deal of personal responsibility.
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Hormone levels increase at the age of nine or ten as a child approaches puberty causing the development of secondary sex characteristics including the onset of menstruation and ejaculation. For girls, this occurs between seven and fourteen years of age and includes a growth spurt, breast development, growth of pubic and underarm hair, the onset of vaginal mucus secretions and menstruation.
Early puberty, known as precocious puberty, occurs in girls as young 8 years old. It is seen in approximately 8% of Whilte girls and 35% of Black girls in the United States. The potential factors causing this early onset includes weight gain, a protein called leptin, hormones in meat and milk, and exposure to certain pesticide that act as hormone disruptors. However, no one knows for sure. The psychological effects of premature sexual development is that young girls look older and so they are pressured to act older. This may influence early dating and possible progression toward early initiation of sexual intercourse. But they are mentally unprepared for the outcomes and responsibilities of sexual behavior.
Generally, boy lag about 2-3 year behind girls in pubertal development. The average age of puberty is 11 ½ to 12 years. Physical changes are a growth spurt and muscle mass growth. It also includes voice deepening, facial, underarm, pubic area hair growth, and the enlargement of the penis, the testicles and the ability to ejaculate.
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During adolescence sexual development, homosexuality and questioning also occurs. Sexual orientation becomes a very salient issue. Adolescents may have same-sex sexual fantasies, engage in same-sex play, and individuals may begin to examine their sexual orientation, becoming aware of their difference in middle or late childhood. Thus, the term "questioning" is used to describe those individuals who are examining their sexual orientation during this time of life.
Society, racial, ethnic, and cultural communities, families, and peer groups often present LGB youths with biases and prejudices that undermine the process of self-acceptance. The racial or ethnic background of a youth may be both an impediment and an advantage in forming a sexual identity.
Developing a mature identity is a more formidable task for gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgendered individuals who also face issues of color. Yet they can also provide identification, support, and affirmation.
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Hormonal changes during puberty bring about a dramatic increase in sexual interest. Whether this results in sexual activity is individually determined.
If children have not begun masturbating before adolescence, they likely will begin this normal activity once the hormonal and physical changes of puberty start. Masturbation is less common among women than men and more common among Whites than Blacks, Hispanics, or Asians.
The average age for first intercourse has dropped in the past decade, to 17 years, with a significant percentage of teens being sexually experienced by the time they graduate high school.
The experience of first sexual intercourse, sometimes also referred to as sexual debut, often carries enormous personal and social meaning. The loss of virginity oftem symbolizes an important milestone of adolescent development.
After a steady increase between the years of 1990 to 2005, the overall teen birth rate fell in 2010 to 34.3%. This is the lowest ever reported in the seven decades for which rates are available. Still, 75,000 teens in the country will get pregnant this year. According to the The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy , 81% of teenage pregnancies are unplanned and 59% result in live births.
Teen pregnancies trap most of the young mothers and fathers and their children in a downward spiral of lowered expectations, economic hardship, and poverty. Because of poor nutrition and inadequate medical care during pregnancy, babies born to teenagers have twice the normal risk of low birth weight, which is responsible for numerous physical and developmental problems. Also, many of these children will have disrupted family lives, absent fathers, and problems associated with poverty, such as poor diet, violent neighborhoods, limited health care, and limited access to education.
Teenage mothers have special needs. The most pressing that can be provided for within the community are health care and education. Improving preconception health and regular prenatal care are essential to monitor fetal growth and the mother's health. Graduation from high school is an important goal of education programs for teenage mothers because it directly influences their employability and ability to support themselves and their children.
Some teenage mothers need financial assistance, at least until they complete their education. Government programs such as food stamps, Medicaid, and the WIC or Women, Infants, and Children programs are often crucial to the survival of young mothers and their children. Even with programs such as these in place, most families need additional income to survive.
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Sexuality education is a lifelong process. From the time that we are born, we learn about love, touch, affection, and our bodies. As we grow, the messages continue from both our families and the social environment. School-based programs complement and augment these primary sources of information.
The Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SIECUS) developed the Guidelines for Comprehensive Sexuality Education (SIECUS, 2004), the first national model for comprehensive sexuality education. The guidelines are the most widely recognized and implemented framework for comprehensive sexuality education in the United States and several countries worldwide. The guidelines address four developmental levels: early childhood, pre-adolescence, early adolescence, and adolescence<br />
The guidelines also address six main topics:
human development
relationships
personal skills
sexual behavior
sexual health
society and culture
Although much more research needs to be done on sexuality education and its impact on young people, most professionals agree that it is one of the most important preventive means we have. Young people, guided by their parents and armed with knowledge and self-confidence, can make informed decisions and direct their own sexual destinies.
As we enter into adulthood, with great experience and understanding, we develop a potentially mature sexuality. Our sexual views, behaviors, and opinions will evolve as we age. We will continue our exploration of human sexuality through the human life cycle. Starting with sexuality in early adulthood, moving onto sexuality in middle adulthood and ending with sexuality in late adulthood.
Like other life passages, the one from adolescence to early adulthood offers potential for growth if one is aware of and remains open to the opportunities this period brings.Young adults are challenged with several task as they develop their sexuality. Establishing sexual orientation includes engaging in sexual experimentation including kissing, and fondling with members of both sexes. During this time sexual orientation is emerging. Young adults also begin to integrate love and sex, this includes addressing the conflict of sex in relationships. Young adults have to learn to unite the two traditional gender roles instead of viewing them as polar opposites. Young adults also forge intimacy and make commitments for relationships. They must gain knowledge of their self and others as potential partners through dating, courtship, and cohabitation, increasing their sexual experience. There is an increase in interdependency and sexuality can be the means of enhancing intimacy and self-disclosure.Those in early adulthood also have to make fertility and child-bearing decisions. During this stage these aspects become increasingly legitimate, especially if they are married. This topic is critical but unacknowledged, especially for single, young adults. Young adulthood also includes practicing safer sex to protect against STIs. Young adults must integrate STI awareness and protection into their communication, values, and behaviors. And last but not least, the sexual philosophy of young adults is ever evolving. It is a reevaluation of the moral standards based on personal principles. It includes the evolution of the personal, philosophical perspective to give coherence to sexual attitudes, beliefs, and values, thus placing sexuality within a larger framework of their lives and relationships. This evolving sexual philosophy integrates personal, religious, spiritual, and humanistic values with their sexuality. Image from McGraw Hill Image Library
Men and women are confronted with the important developmental task of establishing intimacy. And part of the task of establishing intimate relationships is solidifying one's sexual orientation.
Most people develop a heterosexual identity by adolescence or young adulthood. Their task is simplified because their development as heterosexuals is approved by society. But for those who are attracted to the same or both sexes or are unsure, their development features more doubt and anxiety.
Unfortunately we do not know the exact numbers of men and women who identify as heterosexual, gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered because of stigmatization. Gays and lesbians are often reluctant to reveal their identities due to personal hesitancy and conceptual problems on what constitutes sexual orientation. It is estimated that 1-4% percent of US males and females consider themselves to be something other than heterosexual. Ten to 15% report at least occasional sexual attraction to or sexual fantasies about their same sex. There are also variances that exist that could be explained by different methodologies such as interviewing techniques, sampling procedures, definitions of homosexuality, or random response errors. However it is important to realize that sexuality includes attraction, desire, and behaviors. It is also varied and changes over time as an expression at one time is not the same as an expression at another time or for all the time.
Sexual orientation is an area of human sexuality that has been clouded by misunderstanding, myth, and confusion. To help explain the complex nature of sexual orientation, psychologists and researchers in sexuality have developed various models. There are three models of sexual orientation: the dichotomous-psychoanalytic model, the unidimensional-bipolar model by Kinsey, and the two-dimensional-orthogonal (ORR-tha-ge-nul) model by Storms. The dichotomous-psychoanalytic model is dichotomized into heterosexual and homosexual, with some time considering a third category of bisexuality. Bisexuals were considered to be homosexuals trying to be heterosexuals. Next is the unidimensional-bipolar model by Kinsey. Kinsey believed that sexual orientation is a continuum from exclusively heterosexual to exclusively homosexual. A person's sexual behavior could change across their lifetime. He was criticized for the implication that the more heterosexual a person is the less homosexual he or she must be. This view used bipolar ratings of heterosexuality and homosexuality and sexual behaviors, sexual fantasies, a person one loves, and feelings about which sex is more attractive were used as independent indicators for assessment. The last model is the two-dimensional-orthogonal model. This emphasizes homoeroticism and heteroeroticism as independent continua. Bisexuality is defined as high on both homoeroticism and heteroeroticism dimensions. Heterosexuals are high on heteroeroticism and low on homoeroticism dimensions. Homosexuals are high on homoeroticism and low on heteroeroticism dimensions. Asexuals are low on both homoeroticism and heteroeroticism dimensions. Image from McGraw Hill Image Library
The gay, lesbian, bisexual identification process takes time and may involve moving back and forth among these categories. The most intense phase in the development of one's sexual identity is during late adolescence and early adulthood. Researchers found college graduates are more likely to identify as gay, lesbian, and bisexual while in college because post-secondary education tends to engage students with issues of pluralism, diversity, and self-evaluation. However, there are several stages in which the individuals go through.
The first phase is marked by the initiation of a process of self-discovery and exploration, including becoming aware of one's sexual orientation. This would be questioning whether one may be a lesbian, gay, or bisexual (LGB) person; and engaging in sexual activties with members of the same sex.
The second phase, identity integration, is a continuation of sexual identity development . This is when individuals integrate and incorporate their sexual orientaiton into their sense of self. Engaging in LBG-related social activities, addressing negative attitudes, and feeling more comfortable about disclosing one's identity to others are part of this process.
Coming out is an important means of self-validation and self-affirmation. This stage rejects the stigma and condemnation associated with gay, lesbian, and bisexual orientations. Out occurs in varying degrees. People can be out to no one, out to selected individual lovers, out to close friends and lovers but not to families and employers for fear of reprisal. Coming out occurs in stages involving friends and family members.
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The college environment is important not only for intellectual development but also for social development. The social aspects of the college setting provide opportunities for meeting others.
Dating in college is similar to high school dating in many ways. It may be formal or informal. It may be for recreation or for finding a mate. Features that distinguish college dating from high school dating, however, include:
the more independent setting (away from home, with diminished parental influence)
the increased maturity of partners
more gender role flexibility
the increased legitimacy of sexual interactions
<br />For most college students, love and dating become qualitatively different during emerging adulthood, with more focus on sexuality as it relates to developing one's own identity.
Sociologist Ira Reiss describes four moral standards of nonmarital sexuality among college students:
The abstinence standard was the official sexual ideology in American culture until the early 1960s. According to this belief, it is wrong for either men or women to engage in sexual intercourse before marriage regardless of the circumstances or their feelings for each other.
The double standard which is widely practiced but rarely approved publicly. This permits men to engage in nonmarital intercourse, but women are considered immoral if they do so.
Permissiveness with emotional affection describes sex is okay when between men and women who have a stable, loving relationship.
Permissiveness without affection, is the type of sexual expression that usually occurs in "hooking up" on college campuses. It holds that people may have sexual relationships with each other even if there is no affection or commitment.
You can see that many of these standards contradict themselves. However, the standards are more than 40 years old but most, to a degree, still stand true. For example, although the acceptance of sex outside of marriage is widespread among college students, there are still more boundaries placed on women. If a woman has sexual intercourse, most people believe it should take place in the context of a committed relationship. Women who "sleep around" or have numerous casual sex relationships are often morally censured.
College campuses often have lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender organizations that sponsor social events and get-togethers. There, individuals can freely meet others in open circumstances that permit meaningful relationships to develop and mature.
In the middle-adulthood years, family and work become especially important. Personal time is spent increasingly on marital and family matters, especially if a couple have children. Sexual expression often decreases in frequency, intensity, and significance.
In the middle-adulthood years, some of the psychosexual developmental tasks begun in young adulthood may be continuing. These tasks, such as ones related to intimacy issues or parenting decisions, may have been deferred or only partly completed in young adulthood. Developmental issues include:<br />
Redefining sex in marital or other long-term relationships. In long-term marital or cohabiting relationships many factors may erode the passionate intensity associated with sex. These factors include habit, competing family and work obligations, fatigue, and unresolved conflicts. Sex may need to be redefined as more of an expression of intimacy and caring. <br />
Reevaluating one's sexuality continues in middle adulthood as well. Whether single or in a committed relationship, new roles and priorities call for a reevaluation of one's sexual feelings, wants, and desires. One's sexual philosophy continues to evolve.
Lastly, those in their middle adult years will need to begin to Accept the biological aging process. As people age they may feel less attractive and less sexual. The challenge of aging is to come to terms with its biological changes and challenges.
Sexual intercourse tends to diminish in frequency the longer a couple is married. As couples get older, the frequency drops. Decreased frequency, however, does not necessarily mean that sex is no longer important or that the partnership is unsatisfactory. It may be the result of biological aging and declining sexual drive, or it could be that one or both partners are too tired. For dual-worker families and families with children, stress, financial worries, fatigue, and lack of private time may be the most significant factors in the decline of frequency. Higher levels of sexual satisfaction and pleasure seem to be found in marriage than in singlehood or extramarital relationships. The lowest rates of satisfaction were among those who were neither married nor living with someone, a group thought to have sex most frequently. Image from McGraw Hill Image Library
Sexual intercourse tends to diminish in frequency the longer a couple is married. As couples get older, the frequency drops. Decreased frequency, however, does not necessarily mean that sex is no longer important or that the partnership is unsatisfactory.
It may be the result of biological aging and declining sexual drive, or it could be that one or both partners are too tired. For dual-worker families and families with children, stress, financial worries, fatigue, and lack of private time may be the most significant factors in the decline of frequency.
Higher levels of sexual satisfaction and pleasure seem to be found in marriage than in singlehood or extramarital relationships. The lowest rates of satisfaction were among those who were neither married nor living with someone, a group thought to have sex most frequently.
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Divorce has become a major force in American life. A quick observation of demographics in this country points to a growing way of life: postdivorce singlehood. Contrary to divorce trends in the twentieth century, in recent decades, the divorce rate has actually dropped. Because divorce is so prevalent, many studies have focused on its effects on partners and children. From these studies, a number of consequences of divorce have been identified as follows: There is often stigmatization by family, friends, and co-workers. There is a change of income (usually a substantial decline for women and their children). There is a higher incidence of physical, emotional, behavioral, and social problems among both men and women, including depression, injury, and illness. There are significantly more problems with children, including criminality, substance abuse, lower academic attainment and performance, earlier sexual activity, and a higher rate of divorce. Children are twice as likely as those in two-parent families to develop serious psychiatric problems and addictions later in life. Many individuals report being less close to their parents and, if they marry, are more likely to get divorced than persons from two-parent families.
However, it should be noted that the majority of children whose parents have divorced do not suffer long-term consequences simply because of the divorce.
Sexual feelings and desires continue throughout the life cycle and this is true for individual in late adulthood. Many of the psychosexual tasks older Americans must undertake are directly related to the aging process: Biological changes. As older men's and women's physical abilities change with age due to biology, their sexual responses change . There is also a decrease in interest and desire. Chronic illness, hormonal changes, vascular changes, and increasing frailty understandably result in diminished sexual activity. These considerations contribute to the ongoing evolution of the individual's sexual philosophy. One of the most critical life events is the loss of a partner. Because having a partner is the single most important factor determining an older person's sexual interactions, the absence of a sexual partner signals a dramatic change in the survivor's sexual interactions. Lastly, Psychological influences are a developmental concern. America is obsessed with youth and sexuality and often doesn't consider older adults as sexual beings. In addition, factors such as lack of sexual information, negative attitudes toward sexual expression, and mental health problems may interfere with older individuals' ability or willingness to see themselves as sexual beings. Image from McGraw Hill Image Library
Our society stereotypes aging as a lonely and depressing time. However, most studies of older adults, relative to younger people, express high levels of satisfaction and well-being.
The sexuality of older Americans tends to be invisible, as society discounts their sexuality. Several factors account for this in our culture:
We associate sexuality with young people, assuming that sexual attraction exists only between those with youthful bodies. Interest in sex is considered normal in 25-year-old men, but not for a 75 year old man
We associate the idea of romance and love with the young; many of us find it difficult to believe that older adults can fall in love or love intensely.
We continue to associate sex with procreation, measuring a woman's femininity by her childbearing and maternal role and a man's masculinity by the children he has.
Furthermore, older people do not have sexual desires as strong as those of younger people, and they do not express them as openly. Intimacy is especially valued and important for an older person's well-being.
Beginning sometime in their forties, most women start to experience a normal biological process resulting in a decline in fertility. Usually between the ages of 45 and 55, a women's menstrual periods become irregular and eventually stop. Menopause, the complete cessation of menstruation for at least one yea. The average age a women goes through menopause is age 51. Most women experience some physiological or psychological symptoms during menopause.
Symptoms can appear as the woman's body attempts to adjust to the drop in estrogen levels. The most common symptoms of menopause are hot flashes, vaginal dryness, and sleeping disturbances. Another symptom, thinning of the vaginal walls, can result in the length and width of the vagina decreasing and the vagina not being able to expand during penile-vaginal intercourse. This can cause coitus to be painful.
To relieve the symptoms of menopause, a physician may prescribe menopausal hormone therapy (MHT), which are hormone combinations of estrogen and progestin to relieve symtoms. However, MHT carries some potential health risks so it is advised that a women speak with her physican to weight the risks and benefits of the treatment.
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Changes in male sexual responsiveness begin to become apparent when men are in their forties and fifties. As a man ages, his frequency of sexual activity declines, achieving erection requires more stimulation and time, and the erection may not be as firm. Ejaculation takes longer and may not occur every time the penis is stimulated. Also, the refractory period is extended (up to 24 hours or longer in older men). However, sexual interest and enjoyment generally do not decrease. Although some of the changes are related directly to age and a normal decrease in testosterone production, others may be the result of diseases and conditions associated with aging.
It is important for older men to understand that slower responses are a normal function of aging and are unrelated to the ability to give or receive sexual pleasure.
About half of men over age 50 are affected to some degree by benign prostatic hyperplasia, also known as BPH. This is an enlargement of the prostate gland. BPH is not linked to cancer and does not raise a man's chance of getting prostate cancer, yet the symptoms of BPH and prostate cancer can be similar. The enlarged prostate may put pressure on the urethra, resulting in difficulty urinating and the frequent and urgent need to urinate. It does not affect sexual functioning.
Testosterone plays an important role in puberty and throughout a man's life. Because of changes to energy levels and sexual response, a rapidly growing number of older men are considering taking supplemental testosterone. Experts are inconclusive about whether testosterone supplements should be prescribed. Until more rigorous scientific studies are conducted, it is not known if the possible benefits of testosterone therapy outweigh its potential risks.
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From the moment we are born we are rich in sexual and erotic potential. As children the world around us shapes our views of our bodies, gender, and sexuality. As adolescents our education continues as learning and yearning, and as adults we develop a potentially mature sexuality which is continually reinterpreted as we age.